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Envious by Ryandrogyny Envious by Ryandrogyny
My name is Ryan. I am an ftm transgender boy. Pre surgery, pre-T, pre everything. I'm 17 years old.
Sometimes I look at myself in the mirror, or through a camera and become dysphoric because of my breasts. The thing is, I know that if they weren't there, I would have at least a hint of pectorals.
I promised myself recently that instead of taking it out in a negative way when I get dysphoric, I'll create some sort of art, embracing it.

Tools used: Pencil, eraser, paper, webcam and a little bit of photoshop. And of course my sexy self ;p
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AlexTheLazyKat Featured By Owner Jan 4, 2017  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
you are amazing! i hope things are going well for you atm. i'm in the same boat ftm guy pre T and surgery the only thing i do is bind everyday xD can't wait for the day when i can finally be me
x-FLUFFY-GEK0-x Featured By Owner Dec 12, 2016  Student Traditional Artist
You're a wonderful young man, Ryan.
shesaysbye Featured By Owner Jul 20, 2016
Hey Ryan, your photography is extremely powerful. I was wondering if I have permission to post this photo and your story on our LGBT+ positivity account

You will receive your respective credit as well. If not, thank you for sharing your experience as a trans individual to deviantart! 
Emerald-Moonabeams Featured By Owner Jul 1, 2016  Hobbyist General Artist
your body does not define who you are, but your body may show different than what you think you are, don't let people tell you what you aren't. You're beautiful btw. :)
KARA-MATSU-B0I Featured By Owner Jun 9, 2016  Student Artist
you look so hansome <333
motorwizard666 Featured By Owner Apr 24, 2016
Damn that's an amazing photo. Hope you get the body you want soon. I think you're wonderful either way
paul2788 Featured By Owner Jan 19, 2016  Professional General Artist
This is a wonderful concept and a great picture. Brilliant. Be proud of yourself always :)
way2weird0 Featured By Owner Sep 27, 2015
Very creative. I can't draw people parts for shit.

You are a handsome dude and I'm willing to bet you'll get to have chest surgery before you know it 
hermafrodite Featured By Owner Apr 30, 2015  Hobbyist Photographer
awesome manly figure
asinineArSoN Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
This is awesome!
Keep pushing through, dude.
I'm in the same boat as you, note me if you ever need to talk vuv
ArtyAspie Featured By Owner Mar 12, 2015  Student General Artist
I totally know how you feel what I wouldn't give for abs. Amazing and a very handsome dude.
KittenDiotima Featured By Owner Mar 10, 2015   Artist
Hi - i added this to the faves in :icontransdeviants: i hope that's okay :)
repurplow Featured By Owner Jan 10, 2015  Student General Artist
Drooling Tard :retarded-drool: :lovestare: Drooling Billie Joe emoticon  

whoops my gay is showing Fella Heart Kiss (Love) 
DamyenLeFay Featured By Owner Dec 1, 2014  Student Artist
B.A.P Emoticon#45 i love the art, understand the feeling and i hope you're doing well
NocturnalScribe Featured By Owner Nov 4, 2014  Student General Artist
well done!
KittenDiotima Featured By Owner Oct 4, 2014   Artist
This is really great - i've been trying to deal with my dysphoria thru art too, lately, and it's been helping.  It's really hard being trans in this world.  I think this portrait says that in a really bold way.  I wish people would understand, no matter how much they may think i look pretty, when i look in the mirror, without "dressing up" i hate it.  I really hate it.  So, i make art.
Monkeytaillo Featured By Owner Mar 30, 2014
Closeconnections Featured By Owner Feb 7, 2014
Hi Ryan - this photo is great - I'd love to use it for a presentation I'm doing for therapists who are trying to learn how to better serve the trans community (I'm ftm). Would you be willing to let me use it for my presentation? thanks for considering my request - Colin
ADreamRider Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist

You going to look great and fantastic.

Im pretty proud meet someone so confident in them selves!

Way to go.

Also excellent art work!

The-Cosmic-Lawnmower Featured By Owner Jan 29, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
you want breasts, ya little Tranny?
KARA-MATSU-B0I Featured By Owner Jun 9, 2016  Student Artist
fuck you you transphobic peice of SHIT
milk-chan-desu Featured By Owner Mar 25, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
you're a disgusting human being.
And another thing, no. Did you even read the description? that's the opposite of what he wants.
You're a transphobic piece of shit and I hope you feel like it. Fuck off.
XachoryC Featured By Owner Jan 31, 2014  Student General Artist
No, he doesn't want breasts. That's the whole point of this.
0rangedevil Featured By Owner Jul 5, 2013

Wow you must be like three years now awesome cakes : D
Gabri-eL Featured By Owner Apr 16, 2013  Student Artist
I can relate to this...this is how I feel now.I just can't stand my chest, it feels like a tumor.Keep up the good work<3
JassyZuzuDark Featured By Owner Apr 15, 2013  Student Digital Artist
This is very creative! Awesome job! :)
MacDerp Featured By Owner Apr 13, 2013
dem feelz brah i know them
SkyKinG1807 Featured By Owner Apr 1, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I just saw this piece and felt compelled to say something. I totally understand what you're saying and I'm really glad that you've found a constructive and truly beautiful way of managing your dysphoric thoughts. Great piece. You've got this Ryan, hang in there buddy.
Trunse Featured By Owner Mar 19, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Handsome. the drawing fits perfectly.
aydenleigh Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2013  Professional General Artist
Nice, I really like this. And I know it. :D
xXxPunkPixiexXx Featured By Owner Jan 19, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
This is just...perfect. I love it!
ImmortalImmoral Featured By Owner Jan 18, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Favourite FTM picture on DA :)
Vyanni-Krace-ACE Featured By Owner Jan 3, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I love how well the picture fits with your body as though it could melt into you and become what people see.
Mai-ChanL Featured By Owner Dec 28, 2012
I love it :D It is good to see that you choose to go for the bright side of it. I truly love it!!
diskotanz Featured By Owner Dec 12, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
i saw this and just... stopped. i love this piece and i find it incredibly powerful.
nytmyrda Featured By Owner Nov 25, 2012
Holy fucking shit. Keep doing art to embrace!

You, sir, are an awesome artist.

Please excuse me while I go sit in the corner and simmer in jealousy.
FrankenTibbers Featured By Owner Nov 23, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
awesome picture dude
aydenleigh Featured By Owner Nov 6, 2012  Professional General Artist
Very nice picture. I love the way it catches the dysphoric moments in ones life, very catching. I hope you find support on your way. Cheers.
LGC-Ace Featured By Owner Oct 23, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
hey i am seventeen too.
born as a girl but i am a boy inside...
how are u now?
did u tell ur parents?
i got noone to talk to but so many questions... :/

Sechire Featured By Owner Aug 10, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
This is awesome ^^
bettybrutality Featured By Owner Jul 10, 2012  Student Artist
wow that is amazing my partner is a ftm transgender and I think ill suggest this sort of thing for him. He is also pre surgery
Self-ConfidentChick Featured By Owner May 21, 2012
This is very touching, I hope you're life goes well.~
I love you art and I will forever watch you.~:heart:
Ryandrogyny Featured By Owner May 23, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
:) Thank you. You're very kind <3
Self-ConfidentChick Featured By Owner May 23, 2012
:heart: You're welcome! It's no problem.~
And thank you for being so inspirational!~:heart:
Self-ConfidentChick Featured By Owner May 21, 2012
avidec Featured By Owner Apr 25, 2012  Student Digital Artist
Wow, this expresses so much... I love it, really.
YZeilstra Featured By Owner Apr 9, 2012
hey you :)
first : i LOVE that pic *-*

but now : do you know how i can make the binding hurt less? i'm not transgender, but i sometimes do crossdressing and now the problem is that i have 75D breasts and the binding starts to hurt and make my skin reaaally dry and uncomfortable after 1 or 2 there any way i could change that..?
Ryandrogyny Featured By Owner May 21, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Weeellll, first off, get an actual binder that's the correct size. Cause your boobs are freakin huge, get like an extra large. Anything else can cause long lasting damage. There's nothing really else I can say about it. Ace bandages are known to cause skin lesions so they're all over a bad idea. I guess you could put lotion on for the dry skin but I don't know. Also, remember to never bind over 8 hours a day! It's very bad for you. And always wear the correct size and don't overbind. All these can cause injury
koyico-RoX Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Nelekra Featured By Owner Feb 16, 2012
This is a pretty powerful photo, I like it a lot! (I'm a mtf transgender person so I can kind of relate) I really like your approach to not getting super negative when you get dysphoric. I should take the approach more myself x-x
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Submitted on
March 9, 2011
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